*snarls*

I’m not happy again!

I dislike being used, and I think I have been… Again…

Do I have a doormat tattoo on my forehead that says wipe your feet here? It’s ok, you can tell me, do I?

I just don’t get it. I’m not a particularly gullible person, in fact if anything I’m the opposite, I’m suspicious and a pessimist. So why does it keep happening? I seem to draw these people like a moth to a flame (except I’m always the one who ends up burnt!

So many people feel the need to use me as a stepping-stone when they arrive in new surroundings, I’m the one they turn to for support, advice and a friendly face, yet as soon as they find their feet they can’t be seen for dust!

I’m so sick of it! My parents use me to support their sham of a marriage, people I’ve been friendly with use me as their mother confessor, once I passed my driving test, they used me as a taxi service (it was amazing how fast my social life increased until I pointed out in no uncertain terms that I was not a taxi and that they could walk home), I’m used as a stepping stone, and as a means of meeting other people.

It’s starting to get to be beyond a joke, it’s no wonder I have trust issues! Sometimes I feel like I’m being led around by a chain and dog collar!

It amazes me the lengths people will go to, or more precisely how little common sense they use. Lets face it, when you introduce a person to another group of people, you don’t normally expect them to cut you out of the social calendar at the first available opportunity and have the cheek to make the arrangements about five yards away from you when they are still in earshot, now do you? Now admittedly, I don’t think she realised that she was in earshot when she made the arrangements (but oh boy did she know by the time I’d finished with her (*grins* humiliating a person publicly always seems to take the edge off of my temper for some reason… *adjusts asbestos halo*)

I’m pretty sure it has already happened again on the internet (and no I’m not disclosing names), but I just can’t quite figure out what the person actually gained. Normally I can tell early on when I am being used, because I can figure out what it is they are after (even if I can’t quite figure out how to stop it - I’m just too nice for my own good). But this time, I just can’t figure it out. I know they used me, but I have no clue what they gained from it.

*sigh*

Well I guess I’m just designed to be a living doormat that bites back when irritated :-p

I suppose there are worse problems in life that I could be lumbered with, so as problems go it’s not the biggest. It’s not like I didn’t have the trust issues to begin with anyway…

*grins and breaks out the home voodoo kit*

So, who says I’m bitter…?